Over the past two years a trend has infected the minds of Americans: Working out and eating healthy. Contrary to popular belief, this is making Americans healthier.
Since the first McDonald’s commercial aired on TV in the year 1724, people have been under the assumption that not working out and eating unhealthily was just as healthy as the opposite. It wasn’t until Tom Brady’s TB12 cook book and fitness book came out that it was confirmed doing healthy things was actually healthier.
“I had no idea being healthy was healthy,” a Tulsa, Oklahoma resident said. “I thought health and fitness was a hoax created by the media to get my hard-earned dollars.”
According to an economist, you can save money on doctors’ visits by being healthy. This has caused panic in the medical industry, as they thrive off unhealthy people.
“We vehemently oppose the findings of self-proclaimed scientist Tom Brady,” a physician told the press. “How can you trust a man who hasn’t won a Super Bowl in more than six months?”
According to the physician, being unhealthy is still the healthiest way to live. It guarantees that a patient visits the doctor multiple times per year, allowing the doctor to recommend a healthier lifestyle and unnecessary medication.
During the next election, Americans will be able to vote on whether being healthy or unhealthy is the best course of action for the country.